Saturday 1 November 2014

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Irrespective of the dictums outlined in religious texts and principles about the importance of marriage; the decision whether to go in for one or to remain single is essentially personal in nature where the questions of scriptures or rules of theologians should not come into play. This is particularly true of the current situation marked by extremes of stress, strain and struggle; in spite of all its techno savvy benefits.



With much thrust upon competition and rat race; a man's common place existence is one of extreme struggle and strain. This in turn is working havoc on marital and other relationships based on close bonding and trustfulness. Sometimes the sheer apprehension that things may not work out fine on home front has compelled people desirous of climbing up the social order to stay single.

  • People with a sharp or obsessive focus on career and personal growth often prefer staying single rather than bracing up to the duties and obligations of marriage. Paucity of time and personal inability to share and care keep them away from relationships and marriage.
    Other than social and economic factors, there are people who preferred singularity over marital status on account of their lack of commitment. Rather than going for the hassles of serious relationships leading to marriage or live in stands, certain carefree and happy go lucky individuals choose to remain single.
  • It is true that humans, a part of the civilized society long for and cherish freedom. But it is equally important to note that there are ones including both men and women who cherish freedom to the point of selfishness. It is important or rather imperative that they stay single on account of their inflexibility and ill adjustability to come around to share and care for others. So the inability to compromise and need for absolute freedom from interference or disciplining goad people to stay single.
  • Just as inability to share emotionally can be problematic for some, leading them to the choice of singularity; likewise inability to share financially can be a possible reason. With over magnified stories of spouses nagging for money and possession doing the rounds; the choice of better management of financial prospects keep people specially men away from marriage.
  • People staunchly egoistical without the ability to change or modify often choose to remain single. With their all encompassing ego being predominantly effective, such folks are unable to come around or modify to the ways of better halves or partners.
    Marriages leading to divorce or relationships leading to break ups is one of the well trodden phenomenon. With far reaching repercussions any form of break up or separation can turn out to be tremendously heart wrenching. If one is not into a relationship of the serious order, one need not worry or anticipate such a turn of event. Thus fear of separation or one exposed to too many separations in the formative years of childhood may give way to fears and mental blocks about marriage.
  • In spite of there being too many moral inhibitions about indulging in sexual activities involving multiplicity of partners, similar orientation involving different partners is a well established reality. People beyond the bounds of marriage or serious partnership often take the advantage of their self inflicted singularity so as to indulge in sexual revelry. Even married ones may be equally guilty. But the fact that one is single helps one to feel free.
  • Sometimes staying single over a long period of time on account of some genuine issues of financial concern helps one to pick on the right partner or soul mate. Religious devotion may also draw an individual into a life of chastity and celibacy.
    Irrespective of your status chosen, there are some basic issues and principles of the civilized society to abide by. Regardless of the fact whether one is single or otherwise; we are all expected to maintain the minimum standards of decency and self control.

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Relationships like marriage, romance, live together or any of similar kinds can be sustained with a happy note if some of the secret rules are followed. Relationship is completely subjective and no clear cut rules can be executed on it, yet following certain guidelines may help proceeding happily in a relationship.
Many of these, so called, rules are based on the life experience of many happy couple and also the observation of people. When two people get into relationships, many of them wish for lasting relationships. But pathetically, a good number of them go apart after a while, in search of new partners. Let us see the secrets that constitute long lasting relationships or ever remaining relationships.

Breakup and Divorce are not the Solution

When asked about the best possible way of resolving the issues in relationships or marriage, many people may comment that breakup or a divorce is the best possible method of putting an end to all the troubles in a relationships. It is the biggest mistake people commit.
The reason for increased divorce rate is analyzed as the mentality of people who even before getting into a relationship think divorce as means of solving possible issues in it. Divorce is never an option but it's the utmost decision to be taken in life only at an inevitable situation. Do not even think about a breakup or marriage whenever you confront with minor issues in relationships. Issues are just byproducts of the happiness experienced in the relationships.

No Perfect Relationships, but Perfect Situations

No one can be considered in a perfect relationship, how happy the couple is, as happiness in a relationship is just the happiness of the situations created by the partners. No relationship, as a whole, is destined to be jovial and satisfying. There can be moments of happiness and moments of struggles.
The couple who learns the secrets of balancing both happiness and struggles wins the life and enjoys the best possible relationship and life. When in tension or issues, many people may think that they are fated to fall in to wrong relationship, and at the same time ignore the possible chances of making each moments in life happy by understanding the partner a bit more and adjusting a bit more.

Never be Afraid or Make Him/Her Afraid

Another secret of happy relationship lies in being open and frank with the partner. Do not feel afraid to express you mind to the partner and never ever make him/her afraid of you to tell out the mind. When people communicate each other many of the issues can be melted down. An issue, how ignorable it is, when kept in mind for several days, can take forms of anger, frustration, dislike etc., and get expressed in the most undesirable manners. Let the communication between the partners be a frequent element and no one should hold the words when he/she really wants to talk.

Love Defined is Respect and Care

You can just tell that you love your partner but can never express the love as it is. There is no emotion like love, but it comes as a package which includes, respect, care, share, dedication, forgiveness etc., express the emotions whenever possible to make the other person feel the intensity of your love. Do not be a miser in loving the partner and let your love be unconditional. It is rightly said that love is defined as respect and care. When the partner feels that you do not care for him/her or do not give him/her the due respect, the person may think of an alternative to you.

Always Support Each Other

Never ever leave your partner unsupported. Whatever be the opinions and ideas, know that you are the only one he/she can lean for support. When both of you are alone, you can argue among yourself on points you disagree with the other one, but in public both of you have only one mind. Holding the hands, especially when he/she is sad or broken, is helpful to convey you care for the person. Once you have decided to live together, then no questions of separation may arise, even in the opinions.

Friday 31 October 2014

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Arguing

Although you may think you are making a great first impression, or if you have met with someone on numerous occasions, and are trying to appeal to them, there are a number of things you can spot in their behavior, and the way they respond to you, which will let you know they do not like you. Although many signs are quite obvious, there are also less subtle signs that people give off, if they are not really a fan of you, or do not get along with you too well. These are some signs to look out for, which you will notice when people are uncomfortable around you, or simply do not like you for one reason or the other.
1. The way they look at you 
It might be that simple. If a person always gives you the “evil eye,” or stares are you with disgust, even if you have not done anything to upset them, this is a clear sign that they do not like you much. It might not have been anything you have personally done, in some cases you are just going to butt-heads with others, and this is one of the most obvious signs they do not like you too much.
2. Always blamed 
If you are always blamed for things going wrong, this is another sign that your co workers, or people at school do not like you. If you are not part of a project, or if you are only a small part of it, yet you are being blamed for the errors in a project, and are always blamed when something goes wrong, this is a clear indicator that you are not liked by those around you.
  3. Gossip -
This is another sign that you are not liked. Whether it is at work or school, sports teams, or any other location, if you notice idle gossip each time you walk around a group of people, it is highly likely that they do not like you too much in this location either.
4. You are left out -
If you are always left out, this is an indication you are not liked. If it is a holiday party where all other employees are hired, or if there are small gatherings with co workers on the weekends or after work each day, but you never get an invite, it is a sign that your co workers are not fond of you. If it has only happened once or a few times, it might be a sign that only certain people do not like you, but if it is to every event or gathering, then it is possible you are disliked by the entire group.
5. Last man out -
If you are never picked for the team, or are the last person picked at work for a work assignment, this is another sign you are not liked. Whether it is on the playground for baseball or kickball teams, or whether it is at school where you are being chosen for group projects, or at work, where co workers are going to work together, when you are always the last person to be chosen, it is a clear sign that you are not the most favorable person in a group.
6.Things are accidentally broken -
This might occur in a work or office location. If you always have things “accidentally” broken on your desk, or around your work space, this is another clear cut sign that someone in the office is not a fan of yours. If this is the case, it is in your best interest to report it if it is an ongoing thing, or if you want to avoid further confrontation, simply don’t bring expensive items in to the work place with you each day
7. People stare -
If you always receive the strange looks or stares, for no warranted reason, you might not be liked by the person or group staring at you. Like the idle gossip, if people just stare at you with disdain or disgust, it might not have been something you did, but it may just be a personal vendetta or a clash of personalities, and is a simple way for you to spot someone who does not like you.

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Our women are so great like seriously. Whats your view on this?
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I am a woman and am not proud of my actions, or the situation I put myself into. I’d been having an on-off relationship with my boss, a loathsome alcoholic with a terrible snoring disorder.
One heinous night, we were lying on the bed, him asleep. I was pretty much dressed as it was 4am and was trying to be bothered to get up and go home. Suddenly he let rip with the most almighty fart. This did not amuse me. The smell was indescribable and, worst of all, it was of such volume that he’d woken himself up. Impressive I have to admit.
Shaking his head, he jumped off the bed and shot into the bathroom. Within seconds, I heard the sound of snoring coming from the toilet.
But after a moment I realised that the smell was still lingering and, peeling open my own bloodshot eyes, I noticed the dark stain on the sheets. The dirty bastard. It was all over, and I don’t just mean all over the sheets.
Hurriedly, I pulled on the rest of my clothes, but couldn’t find my right boot. Turning on the light, I nearly fainted: he hadn’t just followed through but had actually released a whole live otter all over the sheets. There it sat, coiled on the bed, looking at me. Had he been facing the other way, he’d have shat on me.
I turned the light off, ran out, jumped in my car and fled home. I was so traumatised I had to wake my flatmate who laughed herself silly. Then she sat up.
‘Er, you turned the light off?’
‘Yes.’
‘So he would have woken up on the toilet... decided it was time to go back to bed... got back in it in the dark...’
We’ll leave it there.”

Thursday 30 October 2014

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1 – Stops you on the street and tells you he admires you and want you.
2 – Make Love to you the first day you visit him.
3 – Spend Real Money on you without thinking twice.
4 – Take you and your Mother Shopping
5 – Sleep with your best friend and maybe your sister and feels no guilt.
6 – Can break up with you at anytime.
7 – Break up with you and still have Sex with you, for maybe the next 4 years.
8 – Can go on Sex strike and refuse to sleep with you.
9 – Can make ladies come for him with his good looks, composure and smart
Dressing.
10 – Foreign women can’t resist them.
11 – Nigeria men are big down here and can fill you up, no matter how wide Nature
or child birth make you.
12 – Sex means nothing to Nigeria men; don’t use it as a weapon on him.
13 – Nigeria men were not made for one woman alone.
14 – Nigeria men don’t care about your satisfaction in Bed, he just does his thing,
but he will be the best in bed, you ever had in this life ( A PROMISE).
15 – Every other Black race hates the Nigeria man, South Africa, Ghana, Zimbabwe,
Jamaica, Angola, Togo, Benin, Senegal, Mali, Kenya, Mauritius, Gambia,
Malawi, Mozambique, St Kitts, Bermuda, Trinidad and Tobago
16 – Nigeria Men makes money anyhow and everywhere (Ask the White Man)
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Nigeria's president has the highest vehicle convoy in the world.
90% of people who are indigenes of Ibadan, the capital of Oyo state
have gaps between their teeth.


Only 18 people out of 18000 who registered passed NECO and WAEC in Gombe State.

Females from Imo state Nigeria have more hair on their chest than their males.

The cost of living in Abuja, is more expensive than the cost of living
in London.

Nigeria has the highest number of musicians in the world.
Abuja girls are materialistic, expensive but cheap.
Beware of Edo girls.

Maiduguri girls have the longest hair.

Ijebu people fart all the time.

Even while having sex. Ibo girls are stingy and greedy.

Fulani girls have the longest tongue.

PH girls like it in the A**

There's a place called Sabo in every state in Nigeria.

Gwagwalada is the hottest place in Nigeria.

Nigeria has the highest number of police officers in Africa.

Osun state has the highest number of Yahoo boys in the country.

4 out of every 5 Edo girls have a connect in Italy.

Calabar girls don't want your money, all they need is your energy.

Nigerians make up 1/8 of the population of Malaysia.

China's best market is Nigeria.

A man was recently sentenced to death by hanging for stealing a car
radio, while Cecilia Ibru was sentenced to 6 months for moving 150
billion.

An average Ibo man can smell money 100 meters away.

Nigerians are the highest users of slangs in Africa, 2nd only to USA
in the world.

The most spoken phrase in Nigeria is "How far ?"

Nigeria is the only country where everybody looks forward to hearing
the First Lady speak.

An Ibo man hustles from Jan 2 to Dec 24, only to spend it all during
xmas n New Year.

Add yours by clicking 'post a comment' below.
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Wednesday 29 October 2014

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This question is as old and worn out as time itself. Yet still, nobody seems to be able to come up with a definite answer for it. Really,Why do most Nigerian students (including those from wealthy homes) either have sugar daddies OR engage in prostitution? I took time out to ask some people around me this question and here are some of their responses.

"its greed of course! Greed, laziness, peer pressure, no ambition! Mutsheeeeew!!!"LOL sounds like he has been a victim of these girls.

"Because their parents don’t give them all the cash they need"

"Money, peer pressure" hmmmm yet again

Yet another person "MONEY! Peer pressure too." I then replied "if that’s the main reason, why can’t they ask their parents, guidance e.t.c or get a decent job?" His response; "ooh! You’ll tell your parents you want bold5 today, they would drop the money. Less than two months after that, you want an iphone then later you want S3…you want to go for this show or that trip, you want to buy vuitton this Gucci that…and you expect them to give you the money every time. Naaaaa! Those girls do it for more money." *phew* that was a long speech but he really did break it down don’t you think.

Do you think that explanation justifies the act? What about their reputation? Keeping themselves for their future husbands or wives, the marriages they are ruining due to the so-called greediness? What happened to being patient and contended with what you have? The questions are endless.

If you think you know the answer to this myth of a question, I really would like to hear from you because I must say ‘I’m baffled’
 
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nigerian girlsThere are a couple of things a man could find a bit difficult to do in life, like studying Rocket Science or learning to play the piano…like Beethoven. But something far harder that goes beyond Calculus and nimble precision is the art of dating Nigerian girls. Why are they more complex than the average non-Nigerian girl? What makes their brains tick (or get ticked off). What I intend to do next is to unravel this mystery…
<<Road map to dating Nigerian Girls>>

Confirm status >>> Evaluate background >>> Measure happiness level
  •  Confirm status
When a man starts to date a Nigerian girl he needs to ascertain what stage she’s at in her life – Is she just coming out of a relationship? Is she ready for a new one? Is she sure of what she wants in the next man in her life? Is she still keeping in ‘close’ contact with her previous boyfriend? All these are pertinent questions which if left unanswered may raise issues in the long run. There is also some preliminary screening you’ll need to perform in order to be sure of what end of the spectrum your would-be Nigerian girlfriend is on;

Changeable       <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    >  Unchangeable

Extroverted        <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    >  Introverted

Thrifty        <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    >   Materialistic

Under 30       <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    >   Over 30

Low Self-esteem <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    >  Hi Self-esteem

Christian           <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    >  Muslim

Church goer     <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    >  Bible basher

Dates only within tribe  <     <    <    <    <  >    >    >    >    > Dates outside tribe

If a Christian young man plans to date a Muslim girl then he needs to be sure if she’s going to attend church with him or if it’s going to be TAIF! (Thank Allah It’s Friday!). If she’s over 30 and is a city-type of chick then she may just have passed her ‘submissive by’ date. The average Nigerian girl is also materialistic. Very few would stop their men from spending unnecessary amounts of money on them except if they were concerned about saving for the future. Some girls don’t have and want a guy who has. Some other girls have and want a guy who has more.
‘…why give a girl your heart when she’d rather have your purse.’ – Lil Wayne
You also need to know where she’s heading in life – Is she planning to have kids? Is she ready to relocate out of the state or country? Is she open to being a housewife? Is she ready to take a break from her career and spend quality time with the kids when they’re toddlers? Does she see herself cooking for her husband or rather employing a maid to feed him, with the occasional dining in expensive restaurants on the maid’s days off?
  • Evaluate background
If the status confirmation stage is successful you might want to note a few things before accessing the ATMs. The next stage could take a while depending on how open or secretive she is or how much access you have to her FTMs (Friends That Matter). Just how important is a Nigerian girl’s background? Very.
Tradition is for most people a source of identity but to others it’s pretty much a curse; especially when certain ideals become accepted by onlookers as the norm. Some Nigerian girls from certain states have been stereotyped as being either very domesticated or stubborn or greedy or open to use of witchcraft or prone to not wanting to spend any of their money (just their partner’s). Some Nigerian tribes frown at marrying outside their own tribe. Some parents of certain tribes believe that when a man marries one of their daughters he would be expected to take up all financial obligations of her family e.g. school fees of her siblings, upkeep of the parents, and occasional soft loans for relatives. Of course when it comes to dating, with no marriage plans in the offing, then tribes tend to date other tribes. Nigerian girls formerly based in the UK or US may or may not want to date a man whose lived and stayed in Nigeria all his life. Some local Nigerian girls have been known to secretly want to fund their trip to the UK or US in order to relocate and start a new life. If that’s your cup of tea then get those VISAs ready.
“Some girls don’t have and want a guy who has. Some other girls have and want a guy who has more.”
You need to ask what principles did she grow up with? What is her definition of Love? Some Nigerian girls are very homely and grown accustomed to cooking and cleaning (for instance) in the family home. This habit tends to permeate into relationships (if the man in question has his own apartment, of course). Some other girls have been used to having a help to take care of all chores so they usually don’t dare do anything close to chores in a man’s flat. It’s not compulsory but it’s a sign of things to come. If she doesn’t ever offer to make you something and always allows you to buy takeaways then you’ll have yourself to blame by the time you’re both ‘happily’ married.
I’m afraid if you like the Westernized Nigerian girls then you’re most likely in for a power tussle in almost any form of decision-making. Such girls see themselves as your equals – you’d probably just see them as stubborn. If you’re not ready for this kind of drama then you’re better off with a girl whose respectful and willing to let you play the role of man; taking charge most (if not all) of the time. Check her attitude towards men generally and compare that to your experience. If there is no difference then make a difference by taking a walk.
<<Standard men Nigerian girls want>>

~The Aristo~
– Usually from a wealthy family and spares no expense

~The Aje Butter~
– Has been outside of Nigeria (UK or US) and is relatively comfortable money wise

~The Accessory~
– He’s great for showing off to her family, friends and maybe a few colleagues and that’s about it #youtwolookgreattogether

~The Maga~
– He’ll worship the ground she walks on and when asked to jump he will attempt to defy gravity until she tells him to come down.
  •  Measure happiness level
This is probably the most important stage which must not be overlooked. It’s also the easiest to grapple with; if she is not happy with any aspect of her life up until the moment you’re dating her then what are the odds that she’ll make you happy? Some Nigerian girls are more preoccupied with making other people happy while others are more focused on making only themselves happy. Just make sure she factors your happiness into the equation before you eventually pop the big question – Will you go out with me? Okay, ‘Will you marry me’ is the big question :)
‘…you’re worrying about her and she’s worrying about hers’ – Lil Wayne
Happy dating!
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He wakes up around 4.30am and eventually drags himself out of bed by 5am (after engaging the 5-minute snooze button six times, of course). He does this from Monday to Friday; not because he wants to but because he knows if he doesn’t he’ll risk reporting to the office after 7.30am, by which time his line supervisor would issue him a well deserved query. He does a fast clean – no literally, FAST as in Face, Armpits, Scalp and Teeth. It’s arguably ineffective but fools all his colleagues ,whom may actually be birds of the same feather. He throws on his T.M. Lewin shirt – the shirt that makes a bold statement in the business world, the shirt that is so often used to impress at that desperately awaited job interview, the shirt that shouts to the world, ‘I care about how I look and I know I look damn good. Don’t cha wish your T.M was hot like mine?’ But after all this he complements this pristine shirt badly with his overworked suit before dashing out to hustle for sardine space in an overloaded public bus.


Nasal carbon dioxide exchange is on the high especially on those rainy days where you can’t open the windows too much. The sweat is no match for his Brut antiperspirant but his T.M Lewin collar gets it, and so does the full length of his arm sleeve rubbing against the perspiring brute aka bus conductor. He gets off at the usual bus stop and walks down to his office 10 minutes away. His T.M Lewin isn’t looking as sharp as when you first put it on. The starch-effect is fast fading and as he speeds up the stairs and arrives at his desk with one more accessory than the neck tie and cuff links he left home with – sweat beads. He makes it just in time for his weekly review meeting which is no different from the Spanish inquisition.


Alas, T.M. Lewin can’t impress his boss if his sales figures can’t. In fact, it becomes a source of ridicule; how he can look so good and yet have his figures look so bad. He returns to work after the meeting…dejected and demoralized…he goes to the restroom to have a private moment to reflect. He’s arrested in his tracks as he’s greeted by Mr. T.M Lewin staring right back at him in the mirror. His momentary admiration borders on narcissism but he suddenly leaks a little smile, adjusts his lopsided necktie and tells himself, ‘One day I will rise…I will break away and do my own thing…The world hasn’t seen the best of me…I’m the man’. He rolls up his sleeves then leaves the restroom. He walks back to his table with his head held high with an air of confidence…in his sparkling white (but slightly wrinkled) custom-fitted T.M. Lewin. He looks good so he feels good. He is ready to face the day’s challenges and slave put in some overtime to get back into his master’s good book where the latter was once impressed by the T.M. Lewin look…
     h   
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Yoruba Babes
First date: You take her to an Owambe Party, naturally she does not put on an under wear. You have sex with her standing behind a car in the
dark end of the street.
Second date: You meet her in a restaurant just ordering a plate of amala and two kpomo, she sees you and orders for salad, chicken, goat meet, turkey, etc. you go to her house and have sex.
Third date: She is pregnant, but not too sure who is responsible.
Igbo Babe:
First date: She tells you about her being the first born of the family, and has twelve others to take care of. She eats and drinks, no sex.
Second date: Her father is very sick and needs some money for urgent treatment. She shows you enough just to entice you.
Third date: She has never tried it before, you are going to be the first person; however, she has two kids at home, so promise you will marry me.
Hausa Babe:
First date: Get drunk, eat a lot of suya meat, have sex.
Second date: get drunk, eat meat, and have sex.
Third date: Get drunk, have sex; lets get married.
Rivers Babe.
First date: Where do you work, oil or gas company?, Good, go to club, get drunk, have sex.
Second date: Pay for house rent, assist in setting up business. Play along, then offto her house, good sea food, and more sex.
Third date: Informs you of one or two previous kids she has for two different men, and then the big one; she is pregnant for you, consider marriage or my Ijaw brothers will be after you.
Cross Rivers Babe
First date: Rather you eat at home, makes good delicious Edikankon soup with lots of fishes and meat. Cleans up the house everywhere sparkling even before you are out from the gents. Serves you the food nicely, with a lot of sweet soothing words. Goes to the room, makes the bed and bingo, have sex.
Second date: All your cloths washed, the house swept, moped, and dusted. Water to wash up after a hard days job Food is ready before you can change from your work cloth. Sweet words of praises, and swap; have an exhausting marathon sex.
Third date: Cloths washed, house clean as never before, food is ready and served as if in a restaurant, then another exhausting rounds of sex.
You are the one to now ask, “will you marry me”

Tuesday 28 October 2014

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Signs of a bad friend

There are many reasons that can cause a friend to turn bad. But when they do, it is often difficult for us to see this in them due to the high level of pretext and fake smiles they usually put on. A bad friend is one who always tries to use you because you have many possessions than he or she.
A bad friend is always jealous of you over things like car, your apartment, having lots of money, clothes, shoes etc. But when you confront them, they become angry.
They disrespect you and your belongings. When they borrow money, there never pay you back. Borrow your clothes, property, and never give it. At times, they return it damaged. They may also ask for a favor but can never return a favor. All these are signs of a bad friend.
Below are signs of a bad friend. The more of these signs you spot out, the more the probability your friend is no different.

Everything is about themselves

They always talk about themselves. Also, they could care a less about you, your day, how you're feeling. You may also notice that they brag a lot. Whether it is about themselves, materialistic possessions, boyfriend, getting married, or a vacation, they always find something to make them sound better than you do. Seems to always have an opinion about everything. Can't share you with other people.
When they do see you with other people, they're jealous because they want you all to themselves. Can't include you to see a movie with their boy or girlfriend. Spends lots of time with them, and when their other half is busy they want you all the time. Smiles in your face, but when around other people, make you feel small by continuously putting you down verbally.
They may also do things such as drugs and deny it. They might promise to call you back, but never do. Always keep you waiting. Always make excuses as to why they didn't call you.
Always come to you when they have problems, but when you need to vent or advice they're very short with you. So not fair when you don't mind spending two hours plus to cool them down; instead for you it's like five minutes. You're not a therapist. They may also stay mad at you when you two are in a fight. This is because they can only see their point of view.

They usually behave like informant

They are not really interested in you. You might notice that these people always need to know everything. For example, you may be talking to another friend about a secret and she/he wants to know what you're talking about.
They often try to overhear conversations between you and other people. They often lie. They may fraud their name, age etc. just to deceive you. Be careful from them. They may soon blackmail or bully you. They may eat up your things.
If they bully you never be shy to tell an elder. So try to dump this friend as soon as you find out that they are poisonous
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Why do we sometimes fall in love with the wrong people?

I know many people may be wondering where such a question arises but I want you to know that this is nothing strange to people who never managed to keep a successful marriage/love relationship.
Such people are common everywhere but don’t look further; I happened to be a victim to this. If I have to be very candid here, I will say that most of the girls I dated in my college school days were just the wrong set of people.
This therefore pushed me to the edge to an extent in life that I began to reflect on my past relationship failures and from there, I started wondering why we do fall in love with the wrong people and from there, I decided to prop into this issue and so, came up with this article after being satisfied with what I got as a result of my 30days research on the topic.

This is Why we fall in love with the wrong people sometimes

The points listed below will act as some kind of assistance in bringing out the reasons why at times, we may fall in love with someone believing we’ve met our soul mates but later on discover that the soul mate we found was just the wrong match for us.
  • Relationship dependency: Relationship dependency is when a person finds his relationship as a means of solving their financial or social issues. With this impression in mind, such people are likely to fall in love with anyone having or matching such qualifications. But for the fact that someone has what we want does not necessarily guarantee that we share emotional feelings for them, right? In my article 'Getting over your ex in few days', I explained in details how relationship dependency happens to be one of the reasons why some people find it hard or never recover after the lost of their loved once. A research was carried out by a team of researchers in California after which it was evident that, as a result of relationship dependency, many people fall in love with the wrong people (their opposites) as a result of getting what they could not afford and also as a means of escaping from unwanted situations or bad memories.
  • Relationship by command: Are you aware that around the world, they are people who are today in relationships as a result of external influences and not by their desires and love for their partners? Most Africans really know about this better. For examples, in Africa, at the age of even 10, the parents already decided a lifetime partner for the child even though as ignorant as the child might be. Now, the worse of it being that, as a child, he accepts without any form of resistance and later in life starts regretting since he never married his desired partner and so, it’s evidently clear that their relationship will constantly suffer from petty breakups all the time as an effect of relationship by command. The issue of relationship by command also goes beyond teenage circles. Even at the age of adulthood when we are influenced by the society, parents, friends, and relatives to marry a certain person. When it happens, the sort of marriage is not based on genuine love desires since it originated from influential factors and not true love itself.
  • Social approval: Another factor why we fall in love with the wrong people is when we tend to answer to the call of social approval. For instance, Claudine had two friends and the first got married to a certain star and the second got married to a famous business guy in town. Most of the time, they constantly keep reminding Claudine of their new life styles; they keep talking of their husbands and the big times that come alongside being with their husbands. Not too long Claudine turned down the proposal Mark had made to her. They had shared this relationship for five years, but since Claudine was now influenced by her friends she now wants a famous guy and so, she no more finds Mark interesting as before. The issue here is that, she will likely fall in love with anyone appearing to be popular or famous (scammers, thieves, drug dealers are also famous) whether he is Mr. right or wrong thereby, the issue of falling in love with the wrong person is born.
  • Out of age: Also the problem of aging usual forces others to fall in love with the wrong people since they are usually left with the impression that they might end up without getting married or have a child. This issue confronts both men and women but women know this better especially towards the age of menopause as they are forced to get a child no matter what and so, all they need is just a relationship and this is no wonder why the divorce courts are usually busy as a result of falling in love with the wrong people.

Final say on why we fall in love with the wrong people

There are many reasons as to why some people find themselves in the wrong relationships but what I mentioned above is not just all but the main reasons behind this act.
In order to have more clues on this topic, see the related articles below of this. I should have compiled all the reasons/factors to make them as one great article, but if I do, the majority of readers will not be pleased to read something longer than this.
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The female body. It's a work of art and well deserves to be admired, while clothed or naked.

And if you peel your eyes away from her butt and breasts for a few moments, you can improve your chances with the one you're after. Just look for these 10 subtle signs to understand what she's thinking and feeling.

Pupils

If she's feeling stimulated by you (not just sexually), her pupils will dilate. That's because her body is programmed to want to see more of whatever's exciting her, so her brain tells her irises to let in more light. Bonus: As the inkiness spreads, she'll start looking better to you, too. Research shows that men rate women with larger pupils as more attractive. Time to make your move.

Eyelashes

Hold her gaze for a minute. If she's blinking more than normal (which is about 15 times a minute), there's a good chance she's on the Pill; women on birth control blink 32 percent more than those who aren't. Aside from the obvious, what does that mean for you? Put on your toughest, most confident mug as you look at her. Because of the shift in hormone levels, research says, women on the Pill are more attracted to men with rugged features, such as strong, wide jaws.

Brain
She's matching you drink for drink but she seems like her same old self. What's the deal? Men and women get different kinds of buzzes: Men lose inhibitions, while women become sedated. If you're looking to get her into the party spirit, don't feed her more alcohol. Instead, turn up the music. Research shows that mid- to fast-tempo music will make her more social.

Belly
Want to know if it's a good or bad time to broach a tricky conversation? You can tell if she's suitably relaxed by her breathing pattern. If her stomach pulls in with each inhalation, she's taking shallow breaths from her chest, which indicates stress. Keep your distance. If her abdomen and chest expand with each inhalation, she's taking deeper, more rhythmic breaths—a sign of relaxation. Go for it.

Nose

Her sense of smell is sharpest first thing in the morning, which, aside from being a good reason to brush your teeth immediately, makes it the best time to impress her with your culinary skills. That's because 90 percent of taste is really smell. Treat her to a breakfast in bed consisting of banana, which has an aroma that, according to one study, increases bloodflow to the vagina. And that may lead to a different kind of morning treat.

Chest

Sex flush, a pinkish look to the skin of her chest, occurs during foreplay. It stems from changes in blood pressure and circulation, along with pulse and respiration rates. Think of it as her coy way of telling you that if you keep doing what you're doing, you just might get lucky. Another sign that things are working: A woman's breasts grow by as much as 25 percent as things turn hot and heavy.

Small of Her Back

As she moves toward orgasm during sex, she'll begin to arch her back. Hold her tight around the small of her back at this point and stay attuned to how much she's arching. And, for God's sake, do not let up; maintain the same rhythm and intensity of stimulation until she climaxes. She'll pay you back for this later, with interest.

Fingernails

Pay attention to her fingers; among the surest signs of anxiety or depression in a woman are body-focused repetitive behaviors, such as skin picking and nail biting. If you see her doing that, don't nag her to stop; that can send her deeper into a spiral. Instead, gently pull her hand away, give it a squeeze, and hold on to it. Feel the tension ooze right out.

Hands

If it seems as if she always has cold hands, that's because she does—almost 3 degrees colder than yours, possibly more if she's stressed. Women's bodies, even more than men's, are programmed to keep their cores warmer than their extremities. So to warm her hands up, don't massage them; wrap your arm around her waist. This will warm her core and allow blood to flow back into her hands.

Between Her Legs

Okay, you know enough about your partner's menstrual cycle to know when to leave her alone. Now add this to your arsenal: Two weeks after her period begins, she will be at her horniest, guaranteed. Female sexual motivation is highest when she's ovulating. Warning: This is also when she's most likely to get pregnant.

Hope I hit the vital points?
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1. Guys love to marry an Independent and Matured lady… So instead of sitting there and waiting to be bluffed by a guy, focus on getting a career that would take you out of the house wife category…

2. Never let the sweet talks of  MOST guys deceive you, sometimes all they just want is to have easy access between your legs and run off thereafter.

3. Remove the mentality from your mind that guys will keep springing up to approach you. The older you get by the day, the less toasters you will have.

4. Playing ‘too’ hard to get is the worst thing you should ever start, remember, Nothing lasts forever. If you still doubt, check out the number of matured single ladies looking up to GOD FOR A MIRACLE (Husband).

5. Never extort things from a guy you don’t love, guys always have ways of paying a girl back, either through their FRIENDS or total ‘PAID’ STRANGERS….BE CAREFUL.

6. Never be deceived you can trap a guy through s^x. A man will also return to his wife who s^x starves him for years once he loves and trust her. You can never win a man over with your body.

7. If all you take to the relationship is the mind set to EXTRACT MONEY from him, don’t complain if all he ask from you is your body. He has seen you have nothing else to offer…

8. Don’t be fooled when Guys tell you they have never met a prettier girl, they will say that same thing to an 80year old woman they want to get intimate with.

9. A guy always taking you to the SILVER-BIRD, FAST FOOD (pizza in or galitos), MALL AND EVENTS AT CONFERENCE CENTER/NATIONAL THEATRE is no sign that he loves you, if he doesn’t care to ask and PLAN YOUR FUTURE TOGETHER then you are just his ‘SOCIAL MATE’ and nothing else….

10. If the only time he invites you over is when he needs to cook, clean the house and do his laundry, then just know you are his “executive house help”.

11. If he avoids meeting your family and close friends then it is an obvious sign he is just playing games with you.

12. Don’t always change the tv station from NTV to CHANNEL O, MTV and Fashion TV. Take time to find out what is bothering him and how you can help out.

13. If the only places he doesn’t frown when you enter are his bedroom and kitchen then know you aren’t welcome (only being used).

Have you noticed that most of the ladies that end up being emotionally abused are the ones at the receiving end… Always with open arms, requesting for something and ready to receive… The more you widen your arms, the more he widens your legs.

A grown up guy who gives the excuse about his parents being wild when he brings female visitors to the house is a sign that HE HAS A SERIOUS GIRL AND HAS INTRODUCED HER TO HIS PARENTS ALREADY… ADVISE YOURSELF…

FINALLY, I ALWAYS SAY THIS AND WILL REPEAT IT AGAIN… It’s better to be sitting in a taxi smiling happily than to be in your husband’s fresh air conditioned BMW x6 with bruised eyes wearing a fresh Gucci shades alongside a Burberry scarf….

JUST REMEMBER, THAT DATING A RICH MAN DOESN’T GUARANTEE HAPPINESS IN MARRIAGE… MONEY IS
NOT EVERYTHING….. MAKING RIGHT CHOICES IN LIFE IS WHAT MATTERS MOST!
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Knowing if someone is lying is neither difficult nor something which can only be learned in professional schools. Based on the help of psychology anyone can interpret the minds of others in order to source the validity of what they say.
The reason people keep lying is because they believe no one would know about it nor interpret it to others and that's one of the reasons why it's important for you to learn how to know if someone is lying.
In this article I’m going to show you some simple liars' detective methods that will help you when spotting out a liar. Below are some of the methods:

How to know if someone is lying

  • Fake smiles: Liars usually tend to project some smiles if necessary but usually, you can still know if they're lying based on their weak smiles. When someone is lying his smile usually centers only with the movement of the muscles around the mouth, while other facial muscles remain constant.
  • Incongruent in speech: You can still know if someone is lying based on the alignment of his speech. For example, a liar will usually omit words and modify statements when repeating something he said in the past. He does this since he can't remember clearly what was said earlier.
  • Everyone is a liar: Honest people tend to believe what others say and so find no difficulty believing what people say. Liars on the other hand tend to doubt almost everything you say because they believe everyone is a liar just like themselves.
  • Eye mismatch: Study proved that people look at the upper right side of the eye when recalling something they know, while looking at the upper left side denotes creating scenes. Now if you asked someone the color of his car and he starts looking upper left, it might mean that he doesn't even own a car at all!
  • Ostracizing direct replies: Another way on how to know if someone is lying is by taking note to replies of questions they usually give. This is because liars will always tend to avoid answering questions the way they are. Instead of saying "I took the cake", they might say something like; "you know I don't eat sweet things."
  • Anxious to switch topics: You can know if someone is lying to you because they're usually anxious to divert topics. Remaining on same subject triggers the anxiousness in them that people will soon get the truth. Going out of track assures their safety!
  • Lack of self-confident: Have you ever watch a speech of a confident person? You'll discover that they don't stammer or make lot's of verbal pauses. Liars tend to portray a lot of this when in their lying mood. Even when you disagree with them they tend to be receptive and if pushed far enough, they might tend to provide nonsensical backups.

Before you spot a liar, watch out!

In order for you to know if someone is lying to you, you have to see if some of these liars' detective signs are reflected on them.
Spotting one sign isn't just enough as you'll tend to consider everyone around as liars. So the more the signs you see in them, the higher the probability.

Monday 27 October 2014

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I have to shout out my voice for the people who have feelings for children,who have power to bring happiness to children to hear me. Children are the future of any nation and therefore regarded as a gift from God.When you see your children reading,writing,participating in competitions e.t.c,you would be very proud of them but what of the children that are begging on the street,how do you feel for them. These begging street children are totally neglected by their parents.if you ask them where they are from,the answer is they don"t know.children are commonly subjected to a miserable and suffering lives in the name of education known as almajiri system.This is quite unfortunate because the children are suffering in the following ways: *Begging for food *Begging for alms and clothes *Engaging in hard labor The almajiri system was made to give children qur"anic knowledge in a traditional islamic schooling system known as the SANGAYA.Before, almajiri is known as a student who is seeking for islamic knowledge,but today almajiri is only a child who begs on the street.The worst part is that they are vulnerable to all sources of diseases. Children need special safeguards and care for they are emotionally,mentally,and physically immature.They are the leaders of tomorrow.The government of Nigeria is trying to see that all these problems of children is solved. Lastly i am calling on the children,youths,community leaders,NGO"s,etc to support the government in providing lasting solution to these problems because it requires the energy of every one.
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I asked the above question from some dudes and I was so surprised with responses I received; though some were hilarious, a lot thinks being a gentleman is being pretentious or not showing you’re man enough. Does that now mean there’re no gentlemen remaining among us? There are though few. Being a gentleman doesn’t mean you should be pretentious or act robot like, it’s what shows you are cultured and refined. What makes you a gentleman aren’t far fetched as they are simple etiquette. Check below to see some gentlemanly acts and know if you are one…. 1. Try to contain your temper always When you lose your temper, you are showing everyone that you can"t control your emotions. If you can"t even control yourself, then how can you possibly control anything else? Keep your cool at all times (it won"t be easy but it is worth t he effort) and people will take positive note of your level headedness. 2. Have table manners No matter how you expensive you’re dressed, people will be disgusted with you if you lack table manners except they lack such as well. One table manner that tops the others is ‘don’t chew food with your mouth open’, it’s highly disgusting as it brings one image straight to mind – a dog eating. 3. Respect others especially elders The saying that goes “Do unto others as you want to be done unto” and “Respect is reciprocal” says it all. 4. Do not interrupt .Let people finish what they are saying before adding your comments. Interrupting others is a sign of poor etiquette and a lack of social skills. If you want to come across as egotistical, you can do so by constantly interrupting
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Over the years, the need of success has not beenscary but in recent times the urge to make money which will satisfy not only the workING individual but the further generation .This is seen based on hardship unemployment and illitracy and thus, the fear of failure arose. It must not be forgotten therefore that the journey of distance starts with a walk, no matter the fall getting up and moving forward is the only confidence one has to get back up knowing rightly that;every failure brings with it the seed of an equivalent success. determination is the sure way to success.Pals in your fear never give up.
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Contrary to common beliefs some men believe that there's just one way of attracting a woman while they're nowhere near the truth. I guess it's because these people neither understand the psychology of attraction neither do they know what attracts women. People who came to an accurate knowledge of women's desires for men find no difficulty in making them fall in lovewith them, and that's why it's important you know the reasons behind women's love psychology and what attracts them. But worry no more because in this article, I'm going to help open the minds of women if you never knew how it looks. Below are some of their criteria and by understanding them you stand a better chance of attractingone into your life. What attracts women to men? *.What attracts women? Resourcefulness:Research shows that women become more receptive to ambitious men or men possessing several sources of income. Since women are more likely to get most of their needs satisfied by such people, they're likely to fall in love with someone possessing this criterion. If you're a woman it might sound weird but a few know what I'm talking. It shouldn't be forgotten that not every woman become receptive to this. *.What attracts women? Criteria alignment:In some cases a woman may find a man attractive if he appears to align with one of her unmet needs. This means that if she was lagging in self-confidence and found you confident, automatically, your attractiveness and demands double in her eyes. In my book, I explained how to understand a woman's love criteria and identify her unmet needs easily. *.What attracts women? Love and comfort:Just the ability to provide comfort and love is sufficient to bond intimacy in a woman's mind. This means that if you're gifted in this area, you won't find any difficulty attractive women of this nature. If you want to see how effective this statement is, start showing some degree of these qualities to one of your class mates, colleagues or even neighbors and experience the outcome. *.What attracts women? Popularity:Another research also makes it clear that the majority of women get attracted to popular people. It's no wonder why most of the famous actors, comedians and other popular people tend to have dozens of relationships. This means that women will find you much attractive if they knew that you're popular. *.Who are running after you?It's also certain that a woman tends to become more attracted to a man if she knew that other women are scrambling over him. In my book How to make someone fall in love with you, I explained how you can appear to be wanted by other women in order to increase your attractive level in the eyes of your victim. Final say on what attracts women There are many other reasons that attract women but the above stated are based on the general societal and psychological concept of women's love criteria. But it shouldn't also be forgotten that women tend to be different in some of these criteria. For example, just by driving a luxurious BMW is sufficient enough to attract a certain woman while another get attracted just by assurance of the future while the third might get attracted just by the present of genuine loveand respect for each other.
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When we first fell in love I thought that nothing could compare To the magical romance That you and I had come to share. But as time passed, feelings deepened, And our closeness grew The romance turned into A real and lasting love with you. You care for me in all the ways I want and need so much. I've felt your warmth and tenderness With every word and touch. I know I can depend on you For support and honesty, That patient understanding That you always give to me. There's a special kind of happiness That only love can bring, And I've found that happiness with you... You are my everything
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I recently discovered that many people are afraid of making mistakes in public or among strangers than of dead. It's this concept that soon gives birth to self-pity and a decrease in self-esteem. This fact is sufficient enough as to why many people repress their thoughts, fear public speaking, and sometimes even choose to sit at the back in order to avoid going noticed. I happen to be an extrovert guy but this wasn’t the way I was during teenage years. In fact I never liked the idea of meeting people for the very first time or say what I wasn’t sure. I constantly live with the fear of blundering among people. I guess this was because I highly believed in the theory of perfection. But today, my thoughts have drifted to something different. When I began going into personal development I realized that making mistakes is one of the factors that reflects our true skills. In some instances, it lets us know what we’re capable of and our limit as well. How to overcome fear of making mistakes A friend invited me today to his parents’ 50-year marriage anniversary. At first I never wanted to honor the invitation because the scene was going to take place in his church and I was still unfamiliar with the rituals. Once again I almost put up my childhood lens and began seeing things the way fear-crushing people would but finally went after all. Although I end up blundering in one or two ways and left before time, but the moralities I sort of gain was just way too far from the odds. I soon came to realized that among the best ways to overcome fear of making mistakes is to get involved in it and see what you’re capable of. Making mistakes shouldn’t be what we ought to shrink from. I’m not against making even the most hideous mistakes in life, in fact I welcome them as part of my routines. I know you may be wondering but that’s just how humans learn, from past mistakes. So if you're afraid of making mistakes, you'll certainly end up fearing to learn what you don't know. When I was about to launch this site most of the comments I got weren’t supportive. People especially friends and a couple of those who rarely know me said and explained some hideous things. But that was just their own version of it. Their thoughts only let me know they're fear-based humans, afraid to trust their abilities. The fear of making mistakes sometimes also surges from influential factors and a resent research found it true. Many times, the people surrounding us highly contribute to code this fear-based belief in us. To a greater extent, if you’re afraid of making mistakes, then it’s time you start considering the people around you. Be selective in this realm and associate best with people in congruent of your niche and discard minions. Facing your fears Among the best ways on how to overcome fear of making mistakes is by facing it. If you’re afraid of asking a girl out on a date, you’re just cluttering many things. Rather, why not walk up straight to her and express your true feelings?. Even if you make some hideous mistakes, at least that would serve as correction and let you know the areas needed to be touched in you thereby doubling your chances the next time. Since childhood I always like experimenting in various areas of life and have become efficient at that. Whenever I come across stumbling blogs, I strive to interact the more in order to examine my abilities. In most cases, the end result is that something good usually pops. Buda once said “All fear is caused by a failure to understand our true nature” and he was correct. In this case mistake is just a player that reflects our weaknesses. So I encourage you not to repress your fear of making mistakes but to use them as stepping stones towards the learning process.

Sunday 26 October 2014

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How to stop regretting the past

Have you ever wondered why each new day you feel bad? Do you know why you kept regretting the past? This is a common aspect of human nature. When we failed to meet up with certain task in life we tend face them in future in the form of bad feelings and regret of the past.
Overcoming regret is not that difficult, as many people would try to define it. It’s not all about trying to forget yourself or indulging in abnormal activities.
I have seen many situations where a person tries to stop regretting by forgetting himself through alcohol. The problem with such method is how many bottles would you drink? How long would it last? You will realized that the moment the alcohol wipes off, there lies the original problem and this time a big one.

Why do people regret the past?

There are many things that can cause a person to regret the past when he reached a certain age. Depending on how the past weaknesses were, he tends to face the same degree in his present life. The only difference is that it appears in a different form.
For instance, if a person believes in God in the past and up till now he is still living in sin, the tendency that he will continue to feel bad is guaranteed and that is how we came about regretting the past.
Any form of bad mode we get or regret is as a result of something we done in the past, which could not have been done. Depression unlike regret is just a sign that we have made an error in the past.

 

How to stop regretting the past

Identify what your problem is. You cannot stop regretting the past without first identifying what your problem is or where your regret is coming from. So the first thing to do is to know what presently makes you regret of something in the past.
You can do this by reflecting way back what you done in the past that affected your present life. For example, are you in a state because of something you did in the past?
It could be failure in relationship, academy failure, lost of money etc. Whatever you managed to identify that is the problem. Once you have known the cause of your regret, the next aspect will be on how to solve them and this will require more effort and courage. Almost all problem of the past can only be solved in the present.

How to solve the past worries

When you are done with the first and second step, the next aspect will be on how to solve the problem and this is nothing more than making some corrections in your present life in order to influence the past failures.
For example, if you noticed that your regret is coming as a result of breaking up with your partner, then finding a potential partner will make you forget about the past. If you were sacked, then get another job. If you failed an exam, study hard for the next. If you lost a huge sum of money then becoming rich will hinder you from regretting your past. Anytime you think of it, you will see it as a blessing, right?
When I first started my first business as a wholesaler, I lost everything I had in my first two years. The following couple of months I started suffering because of my past. My friends and business associates made jokes at me and this worried me.
I decided that I am going to stop all this. I decided I was going to change the past so I chose to start a new business and began this website. Within few months after launching it, the site starts making a decent amount of monthly income. Whenever I think of the past I only smile. I changed my past by adjusting the present.
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How people affect our lives

Have you ever noticed that the people we interact and deal with influence our lives one way or the other? I know many people maybe be quite surprise to hear this but I see no other way to put it other than this.
In this article, I am going to explain some of the ways in which the people we live with, interact with and socialise with affect our lives and in this regard, it could either be in a negative or positive way.
This is a very big topic and I can’t assure you that am going to explain both the negative and positive signs to you. For this reason, I am going to focus only on how people affect our lives negatively, right?

How people affect our lives negatively

Do you know that when we believe or trust someone, anything the person says goes directly and stores in our minds without the subconscious mind filtering it? I know this may be impossible to believe but it’s the truth.
For example, when a child is still young, he sees no other person trust worthy other than his mother. The only one very close to the child is his mother and so he completely trusts and relies on his mother for almost everything. He therefore complies with anything the mother says. Whatever way the mother disciplines or educates the child will either affect the child negatively or positively.
At this moment, the child’s life solely depends on external factors such as the mother’s attitudes towards him, right? And the same thing happens in other fields of life.

Our social interaction plays a part

Another aspect in which people affect our lives negatively is the people we make friends with. Although in many cases, friends have always been some kind of support in our lives which affect us in that regard, still, some of them have exploited us in various forms. It’s true that some of the characters and traits we now have today is as a result of friends or the people around us, right?
For example, I got a mail from this site yesterday morning from a lady whom as a result of maintaining her relationship with her boyfriend started going to parties and clubs. She loved her boyfriend but the problem was that she was afraid to lose him.
So, in order for her to do this, she had to always follow him to clubs and parties. Although I managed to solve her problem but her interested of writing was focused on how to maintain this relationship without having to go far. And this is also one of the ways in which people affect our lives either positively or negatively.

How people project their feelings on to us

In most cases, this has to do when we admire and try to copy someone’s attitude, life style, talking or walking habit etc. As you can see, people influence our lives in various ways.
Although some of them intentionally do it (like when trying to correct someone), still, at some times, we are the ones who copied it and later on, it affects our behaviour and life style. And this is one of the various ways in which people affect our lives either negatively or positively.
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Why am I a boring person?

I know that at times in life we caught ourselves in certain mood which we really do not want. Sometimes we feel better about ourselves and sometimes we just wish to be alone but do you really know what causes this mood swings?
Unlike any other bad feelings about ourselves, do you know that being boring is also a formed habit? If you agree with me then you will also come to understand that before someone becomes a boring person, something must have ignited it that caused the habit.
In this article, I am going to explain to you some of the things which make people become boring and how you can use this to your advantage to become an interesting person.

Why people become boring

But before I tell you how to become interesting among your mates or strangers, I will first let you know why people become boring on to others.
  • You believe you are boring: A research was carried out after which it proved that people become boring when they believe that they are boring. I agree with that in the sense that most of them know this about themselves and instead of working this, they look but for ways to proof this to their selves.
  • You don’t talk: Another way which could make someone become a boring person is when he/she decides to always stay quit among others. This attitude makes people stay off you and when they do that, your subconscious mind tends to show you this as a proof that you are nothing but someone boring and that’s how the question (why am I a boring person?) is born.
  • You are shy: Another cause behind this habit is the act of shyness. This is because when you are shy, you tend to keep all your ideas and opinion only to yourself since there is no way to express yourself. This habit makes people consider you as being boring since you don’t speak nor say anything contributively.

How to become an interesting person

Becoming an interesting person is no magical science or something which cannot be learnt or thought. Becoming interesting is nothing more than spotting out your flaws and tackle each of them. This is because, behind this habit or isolation, there must be something which makes you different. Now, what is that thing? How are others behaving and how about you?
When you discover what is contrasting you people, start by solving them. For example, if you discover that what they usually talk on is unfamiliar to you, then you can break the spell by acquiring enough knowledge on the topic else, you will always be isolated. And same process applies to whatever you spot out.

Learn to interact with them

In order to interact with them, you must improve your self-confidence and this is nothing more than trying to always talk among them. You do not necessarily need to know much before you can talk, right?
If you have less knowledge of the topic, you can still be making serious comments. You can start by just confirming something they said, but on the other hand you will have to mind what you are confirming not to confirm just everything.
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Why gossip is bad

I know there are many reasons behind the act of gossiping which some people develop. I equally believed they do so in order to achieve a certain degree of satisfaction, but what I am not really certain is whether they have once in their lives thought of the consequences behind the act of gossiping. That is where the problem lies.
While am still doubting and carrying out more research behind this topic (the purpose of gossiping), still the manner in which some people do it with ease makes me to at times wonder if they are really conscious of the affects.
I believed one of the main reasons which hinders people from quitting this habit of gossiping is probably with the fact that, they never look at the dark side of it or that the consequences are not usually felt at the moment but later when they must have already through with their intentions.

Why gossip is not good

Even though some people managed to achieve their desires and gained satisfaction through the habit of gossiping, but does this guarantee their intentions for ever? This is because at times, I see people gossiping about others in their absence when in return are their friends. I recently saw a situation where because of gossip, a boy and a girl were forced to broke up their relationship just to later found out the rumours about his girl being cheated on him were all lies.
At that moment, it was very difficult to have doubted the gossiper since he was a trusted friend but the man finally realised the real fact about his lover 2years after their separation. He tried to plead with her that it was external forces (gossiper), but it was already late because at this time, she had already gotten married to someone else. The man was so frustrated to the point that he now attacked but his friend (the gossiper) and threatened him with death penalty.
As you can see why gossip is not good, the friend had to escape leaving his family behind just to guarantee his life. You see what mere gossip can do? Just because of gossip, the guy missed his chance of marrying his choice and his friend had to begin a new life somewhere and that’s why gossip is not good. It brings about disasters, creating problems everywhere. 

 

 

 

 

 

Gossip destroys your inner-self

Prior to the example mentioned above, the disadvantages of gossiping are just too much. When someone starts gossiping, it makes him less than a Mr nobody thereby leaving him with a habit of always gossiping. Have you noticed that each time someone gossips, you tend to feel uneasy with himself?
When you say something about a person which your subconscious mind believes is not true, it makes you develop the feeling of guilt each time you see that person. Whenever you see him, the first thing that comes into your mind is whether he has heard about your lies thereby making you live all the time with guilt.

Gossiping destroys your self-esteem

Another reason why gossiping is not good is because it destroys your ability to know that you can actually do something on your own. I hope you have also notice that people who gossip always retaliate in most cases with gossip.
This is because, when someone develops that habit of gossiping, he always look for short means to solve his problem in the form of gossip since his self-confidence and self-esteem have been destroyed by the habit of gossiping.
All these therefore imply that gossiping in not good in any form since if it does not destroy you physically person, it destroys the inner person. If everyone realises this, there will be no need for gossiping.

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